But I always have cake. This was a comment from a client of mine. We were discussing how often her family has dinner at her In-laws home for various events like birthdays, and every other occasion that you can imagine. It ended up on an average eating at the In-laws three times per week. At every dinner end, there was always cake served.
The problem was that this much cake was working against my client’s weight loss efforts. In our discussion about how to cut out all the cake was a bit of a challenge.
Here my client was identifying with the thought – “but I always have cake”. But is that really true? If she was feeling very ill and felt like vomiting, would she be having cake? No she wouldn’t. She probably wouldn’t be eating supper either. But the point here is it means she doesn’t ALWAYS have cake.
When we tell ourselves that we ALWAYS do something it traps us into a behaviour that we don’t necessarily always want to be identified with.
What if she started telling herself and her in-laws that she only had cake once per week. Instead of every time they ate dinner there. Or even if she started telling herself and themselves that she just wasn’t a cake eater.
If she changed how she identified herself about eating cake, then she would have more success with how much cake she ate. As a result, she would consume less and be on her way to losing weight. It really comes down to the thoughts she is telling herself.
To watch a short video on my S.T.E.R.R. Coaching Model which will show you how our Thoughts can impact us, visit my website at: www.ellis-institute.com